Tuesday, February 23, 2010


Hello again.

I figure where I work is kind of a big part of who I am since I spend at least 16 hours a week there. Right now I just work Fridays and Saturdays. I can't work on school days. I tried it once and I ended up crying at work because I was worried that I wouldn't be able to get any of my homework done on time. So now I think it's best if I just work on the weekends when I don't have classes. This semester I also have Sundays off. It's really nice to have one day where I don't have to do anything at all. Well, I usually end up doing all of my homework on Sundays because I'm worn out on the other days. But still.

I work in a Starbucks kiosk in a Safeway. And, because everyone always asks, no, I am not employed by Starbucks. I am employed by Safeway. And it sucks. I'm not sure if I should say anything bad about Safeway here though... So I will let you read this lovely poem I wrote instead.


I get up before dawn when the

party house from across the lot

is still full of male giggles &

the sound of some girl retching

might as well be in my own bathroom.

Then it’s my own personal green light

& I’m wondering if

Scott’s going to throw down

his muffin

or ask me to feel his bicep

or maybe he’ll mumble at you in

that not-drunk-but-drunk-sounding

way of his that makes you

laugh nervously, look away, and

tap your foot. Then you

ask me for a cup of coffee;

which would I recommend, Yukon or Pikes?

I tell you I don’t like coffee

& you ask me if I’m a lesbian.

(What does sexual orientation have to

do with coffee you fatigue-wearing bigot?)

Have a great day!

Then you’re asking me for a nonfat

caramel macchiato with whipped cream

& extra-caramel (and Geoff says he’s

sick of America’s anorexia. You’re

nit-picking calories & what good

is it really doing you substituting fat for fat)

Have a great day!

You want two grande espresso frappuccinos

& we make them in the same blender (but

just like doubling a recipe; it tastes exactly the same)

& you refuse to try it & we have to make them

again & you’re “allowed to be picky because the

drinks are so expensive.” (Did I hold a gun to your head?)

Have a great day!

Then you’re holding up the line, telling me

(about things I don’t want to know)

your daughter wants you to cosign on a

new car & she didn’t pay you back for

the last one & you’re remodeling your

home & just bought your wife a

Toyota Corolla (And I don’t care.

Staring at you with a big stupid smile

plastered on my face, forever nodding).

Have a great day!

(& my hands are cracked & bleeding from

washing your dishes & I’m

splattered with syrup & whipped cream

absorbing coffee into my pores & I

can never wash the smell of it away

& if you call me sweetheart, dear, or honey

one more time

I’m going to kick you in the balls)

Have a great day!

That sums up the experience fairly well. Of course I don't really mention anything about my problems with coworkers. Of course Geoff was great... he doesn't work there anymore. I've been there for a year and a half. AN ENTIRE YEAR AND A HALF! I really wish I could find another job somewhere else. Somewhere where my coworkers don't always ask me to do them favors. Texting me at all hours of the night begging me to come in for them. It is so freaking annoying! Showing up late, not showing up at all, slacking off... When they don't show up I don't get a break sometimes.

8 hour shifts with no break. I know other people have to do worse. Can handle worse. But I have to get up at 4:30 AM to go in sometimes. I CANNOT EAT that early in the morning. So I end up standing for 8 hours with no food. Working. That is hard. Hard for me. I start to shake violently. It's terrible. Especially when I have food and beverages surrounding me. Sometimes it's really terrible being the only reliable one besides the Starbucks manager.

But I told them when they hired me that I am a motivated individual who always works harder than everyone else. I flat out told them that! The lady who was interviewing me, Elette, she was so excited when she heard that. Her eyes practically popped out of her head. She made sweeping motions with her pen across her clipboard. She exclaimed "Great!" and told me how that's exactly the type of person they're looking for. I don't know if anyone else ever says that but they should because Safeway really likes that. They eat that up. But instead of just saying it to get the job, I was actually just telling the truth. It sounds like something you just say because people like that kind of stuff. But I really meant it. And after working there for A YEAR AND A HALF I have realized it is very true indeed. I do work harder than everyone else.

So I put up with customers' bullsh*t, I get covered in all that sticky crap, work so hard to keep everything clean and orderly, and I go home with coffee deep down in my pores. Fact: I take a shower when I get home. A long shower, a hot shower, a scrubby, soapy shower. And then, at night, before bed, when I wash my face. I SMELL COFFEE! Needless to say I really hate the smell. I really hate that smell. At least when I'm working in that kiosk I never smell it. I'm immune to it until I get home. Then I notice the stench.

I feel like I should mention the fact that I do not like coffee. I really can't stand the stuff. I have the biggest sweet tooth. Coffee is so bitter and I just can't make it taste good. I also have no tolerance for caffeine. None. I think I got rid of any dependence or tolerance for the stuff in high school. I just noticed I didn't drink any caffeinated beverages. After that whenever I did try to drink like a Dr Pepper or something I would get a massive headache, stomach ache, and be unable to sleep at night. So now I avoid it. But it's a good thing. Caffeine is a drug. An addictive drug. So now I need the smallest mg amount of it to wake me up if I need a pick-me-up. That's pretty nice. I'm not the "I need my coffee" kind of person at all. We get those types a lot at Starbucks.

But yeah, it's a job. My own personal source of income. I always feel like a spoiled upper-middle-class kid when I say that I really wouldn't have to work if I didn't want to. Well, I don't want to work. But I do want to make money and feel like I'm semi-self-sufficient. Try to save for the mystical future. Even if my mom does give me money for rent, food, and pretty much anything else I want. At least if I have a job I can feel like I'm helping. In some small minimum-wage kind of way.

That's all for now,

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